“People in Utah are generally very kind. Most of the oppression that I faced because of my race had a lot to do with microaggressions. I wouldn’t say that people were blatantly racist, it was more side comments, degrading looks, stereotypes. I think a lot of it was based on ignorance. They had never met another Black person, they had no idea how to interact with someone who didn’t look like them. And it made them so uncomfortable that instead of just addressing that discomfort, they just approached in a really abrasive and rude way. I got called a lot of names, a lot of assumptions were made about my athletic ability, my hair has been touched all the time...I think one of the worst experiences I ever had in regards to race was when I was seventeen. I was pulled over by a police officer for reckless driving when I was turning right at a yellow light. He accused me of drunk driving, he searched my car without probable cause, and accused me of doing drugs and drinking, and I was with my little sister, and it was 10:30 on a Thursday evening and I was coming home from a friend’s house. And I think that was one of the first times that it clicked to me that this would’ve never happened if I looked a different way. If I was a white blond girl. He also accused me of stealing my car, and I think that’s a really common occurrence for Black people in this country. If we ever have success or nice things, we’re accused of―it’s not ours, or we took it from someone else. Because it’s not fathomable for people that we can actually just be successful and well off. And I think that was something that was just really alarming for me, to have a public servant and someone that was supposed to protect and serve me, accuse me of being a criminal, when I was so far from that as a 17 year old girl. And it was extremely traumatizing and it’s something I’ll never forget.
“The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has had a very interesting involvement when it comes to race relations in the United States. I think for every Black member of the church, their testimony is at a different place. We all are working through a lot of different things. I think one of the things that I’ve struggled with is when other members of the church are racist or prejudiced. It’s really hard for me to wrap my mind around that we can believe in the same thing and we’re all trying to be Christlike but they’re acting in such a way that’s so opposite of that and it’s just baffling to me most of the time. I feel like one thing that is so crucial for Black members to remember is that we’re not part of this church for the other people. And any of their comments, or stares or judgements have nothing to do with our own personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It’s so valuable to actually form your own personal testimony and focus on the basic core doctrines of the church because people are not perfect. Leaders of the church are far from perfect and they’re gonna make mistakes. They’re going to have their own prejudices and lived experiences that are influencing the way that they think about the world around them and us as Black people. So it’s just crucial that you find your own faith and testimony and hold on to that, because at the end of the day, that’s all that’s going to matter and this is God’s church, so finding your actual relationship with God is going to get you through honestly anything. “I would love to tell people...that they should feel empowered to get involved and take action. I think at this point in our country, we’re at a boiling point. Everyone should feel like they have skin in the game, regardless of their race or background. What’s going on right now in this country affects all of us in one way or another, and times up for people to pretend like nothing’s wrong. The line is drawn and I feel like people should get involved. Sometimes it’s kind of discouraging. It’s overwhelming, you don’t know where to start. But just by asking questions…”how can I be apart of the solution to this problem?”, “where can I step in?” and realizing what talents you might possess that might be able to help push our whole country to progress forward. Everyone has a role to play, and it’s super important to be able to figure out what that role is and any capabilities you have. And letting your guard down and not getting defensive, and actually being able to acknowledge that you might be wrong. You might be benefitting from some systems that you’ve never acknowledged, and that’s okay but now what are you going to do with that privilege? And what can you do to help moving forward?” |
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